Zoot Suit Riot

Grandma comes downstairs wearing a long cardigan and matching harem pants.

Grandpa: That looks like a zoot suit.
Grandma: What?
Grandpa: A zoot suit?
Grandma: A what?
Grandpa: A ZOOT SUIT!
Grandma: What's a zoot suit?
Grandpa: It looks like that (points).
Grandma: Like what?
Grandpa: A zoot suit! It looks like the outfit you have on!
Grandma: What's a zoot suit?
Grandpa: A suit that zoots wear. Never mind.

Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb

How did Democrats get put on the defensive in the health care debate?

Someone needs to say, publicly, nationally, this:

An estimated 18,000 people die every year because they are uninsured or underinsured. That's like six 9/11s every year, year after year. And you think those who want to reform health care are KILLERS? Are you kidding? No, seriously, are you kidding?

Sigh.

Recent iTunes Impulse Purchases, Or Why Genius Is the World's Most Evil Invention

1. Africa, Toto
2. Heat Of The Moment, Asia
3. Take Me Home Tonight, Eddie Money

And no, Genius, I do not want to complete the album. Embarrassing. As if the singles were not bad enough.

Environmentalist.

Yes, grass-fed beef is better for you. It's better for the beef. It's better for the environment.

More importantly, it's very, very delicious.

It's beefier beef.

Beefier beef? Isn't that the title of a porno?

Chicago's Big Day

It's a big day for my hometown. It's a big day for the Democrats, and for everyone else. I just wish my dad was here to see it.


We lost our dad on October 17. It was sudden, and terrible. I'm not sure I have much to say about it yet. I'm very sad, but I had the best dad for 27 years. The best. I have a great family, sweet pets, a Democratic African-American president-elect, and hope.

Maybe we should all be so lucky.

But I'm still going to strangle the next person who tells me he's in a better place. Or sends those goddamn white lilies.

The Seven Mile Run: The Aftermath

I know, Dane. I feel the same way.